Tony-Man vs Gay Pride

Gay Pride Parade, Chicago, 2012

Before reading this blog, some of the comments, and sentences that are written below may be considered off-putting, and could inadvertently offend some friends of mine.  However, it is not my intent to offend anyone whether straight or gay.  If you are one such that offends easily, well you probably wouldn't be reading anything I write anyway, but I would advise not to read this particular post.

With that out of the way, let's get this trainwreck a'rollin.  I personally don't understand the LGBT community as a whole.  I don't really understand the need for parades, I don't understand why in the last fifteen to twenty years, gay people in general have been really all "in your face" about their homosexuality.  I don't really understand why gay people feel like they have a sense of entitlement.  Now, to be fair, I don't really understand why racists, atheists, Christians, feminists, or really most people who belong in certain religious or political groups feel they have a sense of entitlement either... but I've already looked under those rocks in the past.

Don't get me wrong.  I have no complaints on gay individuals, but in the interest of full disclosure, I was raised Southern Baptist.  I was taught that homosexuality is a sin, and that I should not associate with homosexuals.  And for a long time, I agreed with my Southern Baptist upbringing because one, at the time I didn't know any better, two; it made sense to me, because marriage at the time was to be a covenant between a man and a woman, it seems more natural.  Now that I'm older, and the nation is evolving, I've realized that gay, straight, bisexual, asexual, whatever... in the end we're all human beings.  I even have my share of gay friends and acquaintances since I decided that the narrow-minded stance of a 1990s Southern Baptist Church agenda probably wasn't the moral compass that I need to have in my life.  So, while I support the rights of the LGBT Community, and I'd like for them to get married, and I like for them to be treated as equals, I still don't get the parades, and the flamboyancy, and the rainbows, and some of the little nuances of Gay Pride itself.  I suppose I could blame it on the church and its indoctrination, but when it all comes down to it, I have to confess it on my own ignorance.

Flash forward to 2014, here I am, asking similar questions about why racism still exists, why poverty still exists, why the need to fight for animal rights, and why feminism still exists.  And while all of these things are unrelated to each other in many respects, each of these things really comes down to social incongruity.  For so long, we've accepted our social barriers because we haven't known any better.  Finally a group of people decided that something's not right with our society, and then take up a cause to fix things.  Sometimes, they are successful, and sometimes that which they set out to fix becomes counter-productive and end up making things worse.  Gay rights so far is on the right path to getting the equality that they feel they should have, and I personally agree that all people in America, and by extension all over the world should be treated equally and fairly.  But what happens if the fight doesn't end?  What happens if the rights of all Americans are trampled on in the name of equality?  Not to say that it's going to happen, I don't think the fight for gay equality is going to take that turn, but what if it does?

Maybe, that's just outside thinking.  But I wonder if anyone else has thought of it.  Getting back to my ignorance, I don't understand the myriad of gay people I guess... it's really less about the symbolism of gay pride and the LGBT, and more about the people.  For example, I have three people in the pod where I work who are gay.  All three of them are openly gay, and don't care if people know it.  But they don't act in a manner that's flamboyant.  They don't straight-bash, and they don't act in an overgeneralized gay way.  (Yes, I realize that there was really no way to describe them without being somewhat offensive, but if you thought that was bad...)  On the other side of it, I have several facebook friends who all they post is anti-straight posts, and just how incredibly gay they are, and they post up pictures of gay people in sexual/sensual positions, and they have no substance to their facebooks other than to reinforce how gay they are.  When I meet some of these people in real life, they are a walking personification about why I don't understand the LGBT community, and how off-putting they can be.  And maybe that's what I don't get.  And every time I speak with one of them, it's clear that I'm being judged for my ignorance, just as they're being judged for their hate of the straight person.

I suppose that my ignorance and my judgement can be called into question, but still... am I wrong for not understanding all the stuff that comes with gay pride?  Probably, and if so I can publicly acknowledge that while I support its agenda, I can support the struggle that they go through, I can support my gay and lesbian, and bisexual friends.  I just don't really understand the rainbows, and the flamboyancy, and the community as a whole.

So, yeah.  That's my take on that, Next time on the Infraggable Tony-Reviews, something perhaps a little less political, and... judgmental?  Sure, why not.

Tony-Man's Tribute to Casey Kasem

Zoinks! He's like the voice of the top 40 countdown!

Kemal Amin "Casey" Kasem (April 27, 1932 - July 15, 2014) was an American disc jokey, music historian, voice actor, actor, and was a genuinely good guy.  While he was probably best known for several radio shows, most notably the American Top 40, from 1970 until his retirement in 2009, he was also widely known as the voice of Norville "Shaggy" Rodgers of the Scooby-Doo franchise from 1969 to 1997 and again from 2002 to 2009.  Along side this, he provided the voice in many commercials, and had been several voices on Sesame Street. 

In 1971, he voiced Peter Cottontailin the Rankin/Bass production of "Here Comes Peter Cottontail."  He also voiced Robin from 1973 to 1985 oft he SuperFriends, and in 1980, he voiced Merry in "The Return of the King" animated movie.  He also voiced Alexander Cabot III in "Josie and the Pussycats"and "Josie and the Pussycats in Outer Space."

Kasem was a devoted vegan, supporter of animal rights, and was a critic of factory farming.  He quit the role of Shaggy in 1995 when he was asked to voice Shaggy in a Burger King commercial.  He returned in 2002 when he negotiated to have Shaggy become a vegetarian.

Like most people in America, Casey Kasem had a hand in helping to shape my musical tastes.  Every week whenever I could, I would listen to the radio and listen to the American top 40, and I would always listen to his very recognizable, "guy next door" voice.  He wasn't exactly what I suppose we would consider a radio voice, but he was always pleasant, upbeat, and always had a charming demeanor.  He has also voiced one of the most beloved and long lasting characters in television history.  Casey Kasem was in my opinion truly one of America's treasures, and a hole has been left in his untimely death.  He was a man who despite his message of keep reaching for the stars, was very down to earth.  That was the sort of man I felt he was.

It's clear that Casey Kasem touched a lot of people's lives over the years, and inspired many of them to chase their dreams, and to be what they are destined to be.  As for me, I remember this man I never truly knew, and can't help but wonder what this world could be like if he hadn't graced it.

A Tribute to Bob Hoskins

I'm not bad, I'm just drawn that way

Robert William "Bob" Hoskins (26 September 1942 - 29 April 2014) was an English actor known for playing Cockneys and gangsters.  He appeared and starred in movies and plays, and is best known for The Long Good Friday (1980), Mona Lisa (1986), Who Framed Roger Rabbit? (1988), Hook (1991), Super Mario Brothers (1993), Nixon (1995), A Christmas Carol (2009), Neverland (2011), and his final role, Snow White and the Huntsman (2012).

I never knew this man personally, I don't really know what his politics are, or what his religion was.  I don't even know whether or not he was a good man in life.  What I do know was that this gruff Englishman has a place in my heart for some of his more well-known roles he did.  He was Eddie Valiant in Who Framed Roger Rabbit, a man whose brother had been killed by a cartoon.  I remember that he was a gruff, and straight arrow in this movie.  A victim of circumstance.  A great performance, and certainly one that he should be proud of. 

I watched Hook for the first time in 1991, and I remember that while the movie itself was kind of so-so, Bob Hoskins and Dustin Hoffman had great chemistry together as Captain Hook and Mr. Smee.  The rest of the movie was a little bland, but watching Mr. Smee made it work.

In 1993, I watched the Super Mario Brothers Movie.  In a 2007 interview, Bob admitted that this movie was the worst thing he had ever done.  And while I agree with you there Bob, since the movie was rather shitty, It has gathered a cult following, and there have been way worse movies out there, since 1993.

Bob died of pneumonia on April 29, 2014.  He had retired from acting in 2012.  I still remember all the laughs, and the groans that your performances have given.  I have seen your best stuff, I have seen your worst.  I know that you have struggled, and you have clawed to get every ounce of respect that you have earned, and deserved.

So, Eddie Valiant, Mr. Smee, Mario Mario, and to all of your other memorable characters... thank you for all that you have given us.  You have been an inspiration to so many people.

Tony-Man and the Stick of Truth

So, it's time for the long awaited review of South Park: The Stick of Truth, but before I do, I do want to caveat a few things, as I normally do.

I've been an on-and-off fan of South Park.  I haven't seen every episode, and in fact, out of all of my friends, I've probably seen the least amount of episodes.  I do plan to rectify this, after playing and beating this game but as of now, I've probably only seen maybe 30 episodes of South Park, if even that many.

[Warning:  The following review contains minor spoilers.  Do not read ahead if you are playing this game, and/or plan to play, if you don't want to be spoiled.]

So what makes this game so awesome in my opinion?  The fact that it is a South Park Game, fashioned after older JRPGs is one thing.  But the fact that Trey Parker and Matt Stone had direct creative license in order to make the game look and feel as authentic to the South Park mythology as possible really blows me away.  It's like you are almost in a South Park Episode in many ways.

So, you play as a new kid, a silent protagonist known as the New Kid.  The arrival of the New Kid, sets off a prophecy in a LARP game similar to Dungeons and Dragons.  Almost as soon as the game starts, you help Butters "the Merciful" against a Drow Elf kid, and from there the adventure begins.  You are then introduced to the Grand Wizard Cartman, who tells you that the Humans of Kupa Keep, have in possession, the Stick of Truth, and that whoever controls the stick controls the universe.  The Drow Elves attack the humans of Kupa Keep, and they steal the Stick of Truth, and it is up to the New Kid, also known as Douchebag to return it.  And from there your destiny awaits you.

The battle system is pretty easy to learn, the tutorial fights are pretty entertaining, and learning magic is hilarious.  There is great humor in this game, and it's pretty much everything you expect from a South Park entity.  But the game play is rather smooth, and I find it to be a very legitimate RPG.  You get to fight alongside your favorite characters, like Cartman, Kyle, Stan, Kenny, Butters, and Jimmy.  There are a lot of references to old South Park episodes, The South Park Movie, and even a couple of references to Baseketball and Team America, if you know where to look for them.  I mean, there is a lot of nostalgia when you play this game, especially if your a South Park aficionado.  Even Chef makes an appearance, but you'll have to know where to go in order to find him.

This game is awesome; however, if there was one complaint that I have (and let's face it as a reviewer, I'm always going to have at least one complaint,) it's that the game is a little on the short side.  And while yes, there are like 20 different side quests you can go on... the main quest line feels a little short.  Don't get me wrong, the game is awesome.  It's one of the best games I've played in some time, it just feels a little short to me.  I don't expect a whole Final Fantasy 50 hour game or anything like that, maybe I'm just spoiled by games like Chrono Trigger and Final Fantasy that offers at least 20 hours of game time.  Still, if you decide you want to be a 100% completionist, this game has a lot of side stuff to do, and will keep you entertained.  I'm personally working on my second play through and I'm about 50% complete with everything (not including achievements for the XBox 360 version).

I frickin' love this game.  On a scale of one to Super Mega Awesome, I'm willing to give this game a Super Awesome.  It is that good, in my opinion.

Well, until next time, I have no idea what I'm going to review next, but it'll be a good one.

The Infraggable Tony-Review 3000 viewervaganza-palooza!

I honestly can't believe that there have been more than 3,000 views of this rinky-dink little blog of mine.  Thank you so very much for indulging me in this funny little muddle known as my review page.  So, allow me to provide just some introspective on my life as it stands now.

First, I guess I never expected myself to climb out of the hole I made for myself because of some really idiotic choices I've made in my past.  I never thought I'd find a job that's worth getting up for and working.  For the two or three of you who don't know, I've started working at T-Mobile, and there I'm making more money than I've made anywhere else (except for when I was Iraq and Afghanistan), and it's really helping me out with getting out of my debts.  In the short time I've been with T-Mobile, I've already paid off my 1300$ Verizon bill... which was a bullshit bill, but that's a story for some other time.  I still owe the IRS about $1250, but I sent in my tax return, so that should lessen that debt substantially.  And I still owe my old apartment complex some money for having to break my lease... but that's the debt I'm going to pay off last.  Still, all things considered, I could be doing much worse for myself.

I've finally achieved my goal of moving out of my parents place, and I'm now living in this pretty sweet condo by myself.  It has two bedrooms, two baths, a fully functioning kitchen.  A washer and a dryer, a serviceable dining area (which could benefit from a dining room table and chairs) and a relatively nice balcony.  A couple of friends of mine helped me move in last Sunday, and while it doesn't quite feel like a home yet, it is my place.  I have a place to rest my head, and a place to play my XBox... and really what else does a guy need?  Other than food, beer, and sex?  Nothing really.  Once I get really settled in, I will start inviting people to party.

I guess over all, things have been looking up for me.  I'm happy with where my life is at the moment, and I do see some pretty good things in the immediate future, but it hasn't been all sunshines and faerie farts.  Over the last week or so, I've been feeling very ill... but it really got bad about three days ago.  I woke up with a fever, and feeling nauseous, and dizzy... and I was throwing up.  Yesterday I felt a little better, until about an hour and a half before my shift ended.  Then I was feeling dizzy and light-headed again.  When I got home I had another bout to vomiting, and then again when I woke up.  As of right now, I'm feeling a lot stronger, but I know I still have a cold.  I know that I have a history of getting sick in April, so I know that this is supposed to be pollen allergies and all that, but I haven't felt this bad.  Maybe there's something wrong, but then again all of this could be tied to the next segment I'm about to explain.

I'm starting to realize that I actually have a lot of friends.  Some of these friends are really close to me, and some are new friends that could become really close to me.  Some of these friends are the very friends that I would fight for and die for should a situation come up.  But whatever the case may be with these friends of mine, I always try my best to help them out if I know that they're struggling with life.  Some of my friends are dealing with health issues, while some of them are stuck in emotional crisis, some of them have stalker ex-significant others, while still others are in the middle of family feuds.  I have friends who are in the hospital, some who are struggling to make ends meet.  Some who are probably just an insult or two away from suicide.  Everyone has their issues and their struggles to handle.  And mine is mostly a psychological issue.  I don't know why it is, but I always feel like I have to put on a super suit and help everyone who is going through something, even when I know that there is a good possibility I'll be ineffectual, or worse off, counter-productive.  I know that in many cases there is nothing I can do.  I know that sometimes, the best thing I can do is nothing, but I always feel like that when someone has something going on, I have to do something.  And then, when someone tells me that they don't want my help, I often feel like I'm not a good friend because they don't want me around.  Now... I know that sometimes, they're telling me this because they want to protect me, and they know just how emotionally and physically drained I can get, which also just accounts for why I always feel sluggish, or sick, or whatever... and I know this all stems from my psychological drive to want to help others, I just don't know how to take off the suit and just realize that not everyone can be saved, and not everyone wants to be saved, and not everyone feels like they should be.

Honestly, I don't even know I'm making any sense.

In any case, I hope that more people will stay apprised of this review blog, and hopefully next time it won't be quite so introspective.  I'm playing the new South Park RPG, and I gotta tell you, it delivers all the raunchy South Park stuff we've come to love over the last nearly two decades (If not longer) with an actual quality RPG platform.  But more on that, next time on The Infraggable Tony-Reviews! 

Editorial: Gilligan's Island and the Seven Deadly Sins

You might not ever think of these people the same...

Now just sit right back, and you'll hear a tale, a tale of a tiny ship... who went out set a sail on a three hour trip... (Yes a three hour trip.) Everyone knows of their sad story of how the crew of the S.S. Minnow became shipwrecked on a remote island due to a heavy storm and thus they had to spend the rest of their lives (presumably) together. Along the way, they had wild antics, and several hundred ideas to get off the island... only to have the idea foiled, in one form or another.

BUT What you wouldn't know is underlying the antics, the comedy... the dramatic irony that we as the viewer knew they'd never get off the island, that they would never know... is the subtle evil that each of the members of the S.S. Minnow crew possessed. And I hope this entry, will prove that Gilligan's Island, may actually be Satan's island (which might have been the setting of "The Lord of the Flies" by William Golding.)

First let's examine the character Ginger... the movie star. With her beautiful looks, and her seemingly perfect body... is it any wonder that she was the object of the male character's affection? Ginger knew also that she was tempting them... therefore Ginger represents Lust on Gilligan's island. Because of this Lust... The professor couldn't come up with his best plans, The Skipper usually calmed down around her, the millionaire noticed her, and Gilligan was... well Gilligan. It is clear that Ginger, who is as sexy as she is dumb... represents the Lust so richly needed as part of the seven-peat equation... that Hell offers.

On the other end, Mary Anne who is often jealous of the attention that Ginger receives... is an adequate representation of Envy. Anyone who has ever watched this show of Gilligan's island can sympathize with Mary Anne. We all know how she never got any play. The only character on the show however that seemed to had somewhat of a thing for Mary Anne, was Gilligan. Mary Anne always had to play second string to our Lusty movie star Ginger.

Next on our list is the Millionaire's wife. With her "I won't do it" attitude, and quality of not WANTING to do anything, she is the perfect candidate for the deadly sin, Sloth. Other than that, only about 6% of all Gilligan's Island episode had the Millionaire's wife for more than 5 minutes, in a single episode. Ratings are lowered by inactive characters, and somehow I think that she knew it. But can you blame the cast? The Millionaire's wife never contributed to any of the ideas that any of the other members had, and she never dirtied her hands making food, providing shelter, or anything that required labor. She would have been first to throw over... and be voted off the island. She is the weakest link... good-bye.

Which brings me to the Millionaire himself. Well, it's obvious that with his money, and his coveting... he represents that faithful sin of Greed. Let's face it... the Millionaire obviously salvaged most if not all of his best clothing, his lawn chair, his pillows, a blanket... amongst other things... which makes me wonder how it is he could salvage all of this, plus his wife, and still make it ashore. But it does explain a lot in how he's Greed and she (being his wife) is Sloth. With all of that stuff he salvaged... don't you think that he could have had the kindness to at least share a tiny fraction of things to the others? Nope. Yeah, he too would have been voted off, and all his riches would have been divided between the others.

The Professor, with his vast intellect, superior knowledge, and slightly more sophisticated vocabulary, usually set himself apart from the other members of this island of hell, by working on one of his many plans to get the others off the island. You would think that The Professor was the voice of sanity... but in all actuality, he too like all the others represents a sin... and his, is Pride. For all the reasons mentioned above... The Professor clearly thinks that he is indeed better than the others. He is smarter than everyone else... (Maybe perhaps combined) and he always seems to keep himself very clean, while everyone else seems to be unkempt. The Professor also works on his ideas for the most part, alone... thus symbolizing his "holier-than-thou" attitude.

The Skipper actually represents two of the seven deadly sins. First is Anger (or Wrath), I mean, let's face it... The Skipper is always yelling at poor ol' Gilligan (Though the true reason why this might be so... will be featured later.) because of his bungling. But The Skipper only yells at Gilligan, which may mean that The Skipper has bipolar disease, or an anger complex that is triggered by Gilligan's stupidity. It is not known the reason behind The Skipper's Anger just towards Gilligan... when this Wrath subsides when he's around anyone else BUT Gilligan.

The second ailment of The Skipper, is Gluttony. Let's face it... out of all of the members of the S.S. Minnow... The Skipper is the most rotund. this is because the Skipper enjoys eating. Perhaps the source of his Wrath, comes from his Gluttony. He's angry because he's fat... He's fat because he's angry... and poor ol' Gilligan, the skinniest male character has the take the brunt of The Skipper's projection. The Skipper also likes the women (with the exception of the Millionaire's wife.) to a point of Gluttony. (Moreso Ginger than Mary Anne.) Gluttony is liking something far too much... and when it comes to food. The Skipper fits the bill more than perfectly.

Lust, Envy, Sloth, Greed, Pride, Wrath, and Gluttony... those are the seven deadly sins. So... if all seven of the deadly sins are covered already, what exactly does Gilligan represent? The answer is obvious. Gilligan is Satan. And there are two reasons for this. First... Gilligan is the one who somehow always manages to bungle up or foil their plans to escape the island. Second... has anyone else wondered why Gilligan always wore that red sweater?

Makes you kind of think of what other shows features a bungling Satan, and other sins...

The Rockuary: The Game Plan

Not actually related.

What do you get when you add Dwayne Johnson, Disney, and some kid?  Well, apparently you get "The Game Plan."  And while I don't think this movie really sold on the kind of actor that Dwayne is, it did convince me that he can do different things while sticking into his "tough guy" persona we've always known him to have.  Sure, there's really nothing in this movie that's original, and some of the dialogue and scenes here feel very contrived, but it's mostly harmless.  This movie isn't exactly the groundbreaking, star-making, in-your-face movie we want from Dwayne, but for what it is, I found it rather enjoyable.  An interesting side note about this particular movie is that it's the last movie that uses Dwayne's ring name as part of the credit.  It's the last time he's credited Dwayne "The Rock" Johnson.

So, we see Dwayne here as a star quarterback known as Joe Kingman, who is this arrogant, brash, pompous guy who takes himself rather seriously, and doesn't really like to involve his teammates in the big plays.  And because of it, he never can seem to win the championship.  Like I said, pretty cliche and contrived, but at least he's not himself an inner-city thug trying to learn the importance of not being a criminal.  So we've got that.

The next morning, an 8-year old girl appears on Kingman's doorstep claiming that she is his biological daughter and that his divorced wife sent her there to meet him.  Her name is Peyton Kelly (played by a reasonably talented Madison Pettis); however, Kingman's agent, Stella Peck (played by a more robotic Kyra Sedgewick) thinks that this will be bad for his image.  And initially, she's right.

At the opening of his own restaurant, Kingman leaves without Peyton, and it is on the cover of a tabloid magazine the next day.  Peck decides that Kingman needs to have a fatherly image.  At a later conference, the reporters make Kingman miserable, but little Peyton comes to the aid of Kingman and explains that Joe is new at all this, and was basically thrown into a situation where he wasn't prepared.  This garners sympathy, and allows Kingman to save face.  But ohhhhhhh is there a price to pay.

And of course, since all 8-year-old girls like ballet, Peyton forces Kingman to take her to ballet class ran by the closest thing to a romantic interest in the movie, Monique Vasquez (played by the always prancing Roselyn Sanchez, who I think was in that movie "Center Stage" about the crappy ballet dancers who I couldn't give a shit about.  [get back to me on that if that's the movie I'm thinking of]) and wouldn't you know it, now by whatever con, Kingman now has to participate in ballet.  It was to show that ballet dancers can be just as athletic and physical as football players.  Kingman and Peyton finally start their relationship after Peyton brings to attention that Kingman's an arrogant asshat.

Soon however, we get the whole liar reveal arch, where Peyton accidentally tells Kingman that she was supposed to be at ballet camp, but she ran away in order to find her father, and that this makes Joe angry that Peyton has been a distraction.  It's further explained through an allergic reaction that Peyton has to peanuts that her mother, Kingman's ex-wife, had been killed in a car accident and that Peyton was staying with Kingman's former sister-in-law.  And the movie sort of just passes over these facts rather casually.  And there's the whole moping scene where Kingman realizes that Peyton was the best thing that had happened to him... it's pretty formulaic and a bit groan-worthy, but for what it gave, it's pretty harmless and it doesn't become the focus for very long.

It's championship game time, and Kingman gets injured.  Peyton returns to his side and gives him the same words of encouragement he once gave her, not to give up and throw away opportunities, and in the end, Kingman learns the value of teamwork, and the value of being a father.  He turns down a multi-million dollar sponsorship, and decides to be a father.  And it all wraps up rather nicely.

So, that's "The Game Plan" in a nutshell, and while it didn't exactly add anything revolutionary to the awkward father story formula, it does do a good representation of it.  It has a cohesive story, and there are a few touching moments.  Madison Pettis is also a pretty competent actor, and fortunately she's not overbearing nor hard to listen to.  It's clear that she wanted to get the job done not only right, but well.  I do think, that this movie is really the movie that showed that Dwayne Johnson does have potential, and does have range.

On a scale from one to Super Mega Awesome, I'm going to rate this movie a Really Good.  Tune in next time when The Rockuary tackles (see what I did there) "Get Smart (2008)"